Nightswimming
Dogs eh? One minute they're licking their arse, the next they're trying to lick my face. Well no dice pooch - your arse, my face? No match. It's bad enough taking you out every night for a refreshing Combined with the ultimate pleasure of grasping piles of still steaming shit with only the condom-like thickness of a Tesco plastic bag between my fingers and the offending dollops, it seems I drew the short straw in this whole 'let's get another dog' scenario.
Cheers Dearest. Good idea a dog. Good idea.
Just over a week back at work and the faceless twunts who occupy the upper echelon: the back-stabbing, career-obsessed, no-life pricks we are taught to look up to as 'go-getters', 'vibrant', 'proactive' and *snort* 'the drivers of British Industry', have started dipping their collective oars in the already choppy waters of outsourced IT support in a leading multinational defence contractor.
We now need - apparently - a software tool that allows us to record what we do with our time when we're not 'delighting customers' with our expertise, ready wit and ability to interact with a cleaner or CEO without fear or favour. This, we were told by some chap from overseas who kept calling us 'you guys', was to enable adoption of 'best practice' and 'cross-pollinisation' with the added bonus of finally letting the powers that be realise just how hard we work.
Well, as the laughing policemen once commented.......HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA....etc.
And if life wasn't crap enough, the enigma that is Manchester City somehow contrive to lose against Oldham Athletic in t'Cup.
To quote Mr Stanshall, sometimes you just can't win.
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