OCCUPIED COUNTRY

Happy Birthday To You

Jesus wept! Just realised - this blog started a year ago today and here I am with nothing to say.

OK, on my first blogday I was mostly ill in bed reading The Complete Pratt. I boiled a couple of eggs at around 1:30pm and, out the corner of my eye, spotted a pair of baseball-capped, hoods-up scrotes attempting to break in the house at the back - in broad daylight! They just couldn't give a shit could they? I mean this isn't a fuckin' sink estate or anything, oh no, this is, literally, Semi-Detached-Suburbia, and Semi-Detached-Suburban-Mr-Jones' ticky-tacky houses are chock-full of fabulous consumer durables. Essentially they must've done a risk assessment and figured "let's go for it - hell the police will never get hold of us anyway, and, if they do, well our Mam's and Dad's will support us when we accuse the victims of using excessive force." Meanwhle there was I wearing nothing but a rancid blue towelling dressing gown and a pair of slippers with a football motiff. Ready for action? You bet I wasn't.

Twats.

A few neighbours spotted the wankers as well and gave chase, but they were well away.

This evening Dearest went to the quiz without me as I sniffled and snotted and croaked and grunted at home listening to the BBC's radio playback facility. Oh yes, I *do* believe in the BBC.

First off was Stuart Maconie's Critical List. Tonight it was The Blue Nile. Later I revisited George Melly's "Memories of the Blues" (twice actually).

So that was it, my first blogday. Hot Damn! I feel like the Queen - I've now got TWO birthdays. Yee Haa!

11:30am flight to Nice on Saturday so I need to be fully fit. Dearest is a powerfully fit woman when it comes to exploring foreign cities - especially the shopping areas. Here's hoping.